Well, that basically sums up the weekend. But before I go into any details about what happened. Here's something to liven up your tiring day! There is a VERY funny 'article' I came across while hanging about at http://www.stomp.com.sg/. Its about a young teacher making fun of Primary 3 students in a prestigious school about how badly their English compo is written. As the picture will turn out to be very small, I will painstakinglly type out the student's compo WORD BY WORD, no editing is done. So enjoy laughing!
Red coloured words are funny phrases/ words.
Disclaimer: Spelling or any other mistakes made here are purely the Primary school student's fault, it has got nothing to do with me! :D
Compo 1:
At sunday afternoon, their building was burnt. They dashed outside, they can't fine their child and they are very sad. Their parents called the fire engine to come. The fire engine came, the fire engine dashed inside to rescue the child, the fire engine is as brave as a lion, they went inside and the door is lock, he bank the door and its open sudderly he bank until the child the child is Inpain. They rescue the boy, The parents is very glad they rescue their child. They saw the fire engine taking him out of the building. They were very thankful to the fire engine.
Compo 2:
One morning there was a fire in the building. And everybody were screaming and shouting and running away. And crying.
And Tom mother was worried because Tom was trapped inside. They were crying. But soon now later they Tom were very happy that is not injured. Tom missed them and they missed Tom. And they Tom that this will never happen again, and they live happily ever after. And were so the firefrighthers save the child And they so happy, every after.
Compo 3:
One day there was a boy. In the house. All the people were crying. The boy mother and father tell the fireman about the boy at the house inside have had fire. The fireman did their best. The fireman use the water to make the inside of the house. They use their helmet to bang the door. Because there was a fire. The fire safe the boy. The boy was safe. The boy can't go out because all the fire was trapped by him. Her mother was very happy to see him come back.. The fire was very big. The boy was inside the house. The fire man tell the boy to come out.
Lastly, Compo 4:
One sunday a building has fire everyone, Run away and one woman was finding her son, The woman talk to the men she said save my son, my son is the building at 9 floor then he men go to 9 floor then he looking for the boy, then he save the boy and the mother and father are very very very happy the boy mother and father very very Thank you to the men, Then whole frilly were very very very happy end to their very very old house and they live with thire Grandma and the boy mother told his Grandma said the men is a brave men.
Phew! That was tiring. But whatever, I was laughing while typing this out. Its just hilarious! I especially like the part in Compo 2 where the student said " But SOON now later" LOL! And this one in Compo 3 " They use their helmet to bang the door". In Compo 3, the boy had the amazing ability to 'trap the fire'. LOL lor. The writer carried on saying that his English when he was Primary 3 was never this bad. I don't mean to laugh at the students who write the compo as this is just purely for entertainment's sake. Hope you enjoyed laughing your heads off.
If you want to read the whole article, go to: http://singaporeseen.stomp.com.sg/singaporeseen/viewContent.jsp?id=14188
Now, the weekend started off quite optimistically. I kind of look foward to flag day as I have never done flag day before. Digressing a little, I used to have the impression that flag day is a day where people come out in force to carry flags. LOL, come to think of it, how naive can I be to take it as a literal meaning. Ok, where was I saying? Ya, reached school quite early - together with Yagesh, not many people were in school yet. So went round the school and saw Haikal sitting at the benches, chatted for a bit and then we returned to the parade square.
Boy oh boy were we in for a shock. Pratically the whole Sec 4 peeps were already assembled. How time flies. I noticed that Ryan (with her iconic bush head) can't be spotted anywhere. So i presumed that she was late YET AGAIN! I called her hoping to remind her to wake up from her usualy deep slumber. To my suprise, she was no where near bed. Guess where she was? A metre behind me. LOL. I kept checking to see if she was there, not once, not twice, neither is it three times. But i checked a total of 5 times and I still can't see her iconic hair before calling her. Was she that hard to spot? She then waved at me while talking on the phone. I relealised that I had just made a fool out of myself :( Good thing I wasn't the only one who called to find out where she is. She said in fustration that why is everybody calling her to remind her not to be late. Haha, I'll tell you why, coz you're often late for appointments and many people took notice of it already. Don't be sad, coz at least you are not late this time round which shows that you are trying hard to change. Good job there, keep it up!
There were some late birds (borrowed from the term " Early birds") who arrived just as the bus was about to leave. Yeah! Finally off to Ikea. It was a terribly short ride to Ikea. We went to basement one to find a long queue awaiting us at the collection point. There was 2 ang mohs who were manning the collection point. While queuing in the hot and stuffy carpark filled with Carbon Monoxide, some weird things started to happen. Loo Loo, which was carrying some ladies handbag or something started gaying about with the "Pai Kia" gang. He then strangled Hai Shien in typical gay fashion. Don't know why Loo Loo like to strangle people. Haha, quite funny la. Then there was a Ford Focus parked nearby with it's rear lights badly damaged. I took a picture of it but sadly, the pictured was lost in 'transaction'. That was the first of a series of bad things to come. SOON, we collected our tins and off we go. We wanted to go to Orchard as we anticipate a crowd (a generous one) there. On the way to the bus stop, Cy3lx got a donation from this very kind guy who walked up to him and just gave him $$. So kind! We asked a few others around but nobody wants to donate. I know exactly how they feel, I've been in this situation before and I don't blame those who don't want to donate. If I was approached on any other day, I would not donate also.
Oh wait, before I forget, here are some gay pictures of Loo Loo:
Loo Loo strangling Hai Shien. Look how happy they are together.
Loo Loo doing some disgusting things with his hands (Red Circle)
Also note his woman's handbag (Blue Arrow) He looks quite feminine from this angle!
We took bus 14 to Orchard. On the way there, Ryan's mother called to express anger over Ryan's flag day. Her mum said it is a begger's job (which I completely agree) and Ryan should not continue to degrade herself further. They had a long moment of heated exchange. Ryan then suggest that her mother should call Loo Loo to clarify. I guess Loo Loo must have gotten a loud and angry blarring (poor thing). Ryan was later told to come back immediately and not to participate further in the flag day. One down, 2 to go. I feel sad that she has to go back as she has the best social skills and could keep us entertained through the day. We sent her off at a (quite far away bus stop). Saw a Ferrari F430 spider along the way! But best of all, I saw a F1 exhibithion held in front of Ngee Ann City! Wow Wow! This could keep me entertained for quite a while! Now that Ryan is gone, I went back to the F1 exhibtion where I took some pictures. It is promoting the M'sian Grand Prix and 2 F1 cars were showcased. How sly can M'sia be. They knew that S'pore is holding a F1 race and they want to snatch customers away. But who cares, at least I get to see F1 cars. I also received a large poster. Here are some pictures:
The larger than usual BMW Sauber F1 team poster I received from a salesgirl. How nice!
Pasted it on my wall - The biggest poster so far in my room! (Doesn't look big here, but its sure big!)
The 2001 Sauber F1 car. Very nostaligic car! Old style design looks refreshing compared to the current one.
2005 BMW Sauber F1 car.
Porcshe 911 (997) GT3 RS. This car was raced in the Porcshe Carrera GT Cup championship.
I played the F1 simulator afterwards. I have to wait for quite a while before I got my turn. The cockpit was a little hard to get in. It was quite narrow. Once in, it was quite comfortable (but very low) except that the pedals were placed a little too high - which makes your feet tired after a while. They insist that I play the M'sian track (Sepang Race Track) and use only BMW Sauber car - to my biggest disapointment. I thought i could use a Ferrari to prove all those BMW supporters there that Ferrari, not BMW is the fastest car. Whatever, I started from last place (22nd place) and I am given 3 laps to (try) and win the race. The race started and I went up to 11th place by the end of the first lap. Thats 11 cars in one lap! I overtook the 2 Ferraris on the second lap. (NOOOO!! Ferrari, how can you lose to a BMW -Sobs) It got me up to 7th place by the end of the second lap. Now, the most hated driver in F1 history is a place ahead of me. Thats the big baby who needs constant petting - Fernando Alonso! This guy only know how to complain and he is not popular at all in the F1 community. He was my main target before the race and I must overtake him no matter what it takes! I slipstreamed him till the end of the start/finish straight. At turn one, I came out of his slipstream and promptly overtook him. I wanted to give a (you know what) finger to him while overtaking. But this is only a simulation and I should not get worked up. By the end of the race, I got 5th place. This means I overtook 16 cars in 3 laps! If i had another extra 2 laps, I could have won the race. I had my fun while spending almost 45mins being excited about F1. Now, who says you can't have fun while collecting donations. I just proved those idiots wrong!
Now, back to the boring 'labour' of collecting donations. Cy3lx pasted stickers on his face which attracted lots of attention (and donations too!) Whille walking, we noticed that we are not the only one that thinks Orchard Rd is a good place to collect donations. Many other people, (some from other schools) are out there collecting. But the difference is, they were very hard working, chasing after people and not hanging out in groups (like us). Whereas, our Queensway group are not concetrating on their job but instead, you can see them walking in large groups chatting like they are out on a holiday. Sadly (or happily) we are also one of the slackers. Along the way, we saw Rachel and Raslina, Vina, Randy and Ji Heon, Yun Keat, Keith and Hai Shien. Wow, Orchard so popular! We also saw Nanyang, and Crescent girls. I think there are some other schools we saw, can't remember what school though.
I think at most I collected 2 donations from people. The rest of the money comes from me, Ryan and Cy3lx. Soon Varun and Minh, the Vietnam gangster joined us. We walked around aimlessly. Varun was crazy about his bus while I was crazy about my car. I saw alot of S'pore Grand Prix advertisements at bus stops. One of these adverts caught my attention.
Very unique and beautiful advertisement at a bus stop outisde Tangs. Upon closer inspection, I found out that they used the basic shape of a Ferrari 248F1(though its yellow in colour) . Namely the mirrors, front wing, rear wing and side pods (basically the whole car-lols!) The bus stop also showcases a TV with F1 footages. So cool! [On the road: Note the Black Mazda RX8 with nice and shiny rims. Nice modification!]
I also saw this very rare car: A Mercedes SL55 AMG. Very powerful sports car. (Note the 4 exhaust) VROOOOOMMMMMM! =====>
Saw several other cars like the Porsche Turbo which has a really loud engine! A Jaguar XK and a Lamboghini Murcielago LP640. Also saw alot of of Chrysler 300c for some strange reasons. We went to eat donuts at Meredien hotel. Their donuts are extremely nice, much nicer than Donut factory. I chose mint and chocolate flavour. The only bad thing about it is that their chocolate melts extremely fast. Had to lick the choc off my fingers after eating (Eww! Ya I know, its disgusting, but its finger licking good!) Later Cy3lx went spastic and asked for donations from the police guarding the Istana. The police prompty chased him away when Cy3lx was about 30m away. Hah! Owned! Went to Plaza Singapura later and saw that there was a long queue for some idol contest. There were already some students collecting donations from them. So I decided that enough is enough! I used the stickers to seal the gap (which is used to insert coins.) With this done, I announced to everyone present that : " This donation drive is offically deemed as a failure and I shall declare it CLOSED!" Hip Hip Hurray! Finally after 3 Hrs on the streets, we are finally going back. We still have 2 more hours to spare. I suggested that we should go to Plaza Sing to shop but the others are kiasu and think that going back to Ikea to return our tins would be better. Well, majority wins and I followed them to the bus stop with a heavy heart.
Varun said that 64 was the better route back, we blindly followed him and found ourself doing circles at Stirling Road. Varun got several hits on the head with the F1 poster for taking us on a joy ride. Minh has already fallen asleep by the time we came out of our 'driving round in circles party'. Once at Ikea, Cy3lx's stickers on his face attracted alot of attention from Queenstown Sec pupils. We went to Ikea cafe to have a bite when those Queenstown bastards went to disturb us. They asked if I could donate some money for them. I obviously said no as I donated some for myself! They kept pestering, so I said that I would not donate money from some women welfare thing. They gave me the look of stupidity. They asked me what women? LOL! They don't even know what welfare they are collection donations for and yet they want to argue with me? After much pestering, they finally gave up and turned their attention to Cy3lx instead. They mocked him for his 'babarian' looks. Some 'interesting' words was blurted out by them which we conveniently ignored - We would not degrade and disgrace ourself to the basement by arguring with them. Whatever! If any Queenstown Sec pupil is reading this. I'm not afraid to say that your school has discilpline problems and some of your pupils needs to be admited to IMH for mental sickness. Simply said, Queenstown Suck!
After that lame session with the retarded queenstown people, we returned our tins to those ang mohs. We are supposed to return it at 2pm, but we came back at 1pm, 1 hr early! We got a rude 'scolding' from them afterwards. Warning: Read with discression, some mildy explicit words will be used. This ugly fat ang moh said that our tins are too light and asked where we went collecting. We said we went Orchard. They rebutted back like a retard saying " Orchard is the worst place to collect!!! This is too much, just too much!" Excuse me? Whats too much? Our $$ collected or your dying brain cells? We are being so kind to help you collect money which will go to YOU and here you are scolding us because we collected too little? What sense are you talking here? We receive no benefits whatsoever. We have to pay for our own transport, stand under the hot sun being shunned by the public like beggers. We degrade ourself just for your whatever "Women welfare" and now you are not only being ungrateful, but rude too! They saw the sticker on the coin gap which I pasted. They say that each tin cost 80 cents and I am wasting their resoruces. She also assumed that there is 80 cents inside the tin. Now, don't come to conclusions before opening the tin. I could have a $100 note in there and you will not feel or hear a thing. Retarded women. Who cares about your welfare? She also said 'do a better job next year.' Ermmm, I'm not coming back next year and never will! The next time I see you women on the streets, I will laugh at you and say 'your mother' before strolling off! My mum does not believe this organisation exist. My mum also said that women do not need this kind of welfare and they could be out to con us. Idiots, I'm not suprised if you women have to go to court for a case similar to the old NKF! We stomped off to change to our home clothes and saw Haikal walking quickly to somewhere. We stopped him and questioned him. He said he's going Vivo City! How coincedental, we are also planning to go Vivo, we waited for him and walked to the bus stop, meeting some of our friends who just arrived.
We took 855 and happen to meet Ryan on the bus. Haikal went (not emo, but quiet) while the rest of us chatted. When we reached vivo, Haikal decided to stay on the bus for obvious reasons. For some strange reasons, Haikal likes to 'surrender' his phone to Elsie. So Elsie called both Cy3lx and me to ask about the whereabouts of Haikal. Argh, whatever, hope they solve their communication problems. So we wonderd around vivo and spotted this shop:
"God - Diva" o.0 [Hail the god!] or Go Diva. Haha, I did not know Diva owns a shop. Chocolate shop somemore. I want chocolate!
Once there, I greeted Dan's family and watched his bro's concert for a while. I'm not a fan of loud rock music so I was feeling kinda bored. Started eating my sushi lunch and glupped down my Meji milk which tasted so nice. Dan's mum later gave us a lucky draw coupon to fill up. Thinking that I would not win any lucky draw, I filled up randomly and drop it in the lucky draw box. There were a few perfomance before the lukcy draw results annoucement. By then, everybody got bored. Ryan made her way home, Danial went to roam around (no where near the stage) while me? I am sitting near the stage, getting ready to go home. I packed my rubbish in a plastic bag and walked towards the bin when the announcer called my name. I'm like, OMG? I won the lucky draw?? How can I be so lucky? I am so unprepared, luckily i don't have to go on stage to collect the prize. Or else it will be an embarassment carrying my rubbish up the stage! :D From this, I can conclude that to win a lucky draw, you must NOT be thinking of winning. And most importantly, BE PRESENT! Don't go roaming around and find out later you could have won the prize. Anyway I won some useless stuffs like T shirt, stickers, face towel. But the best thing in my prize was 2 movie tickets for any movie - valid for 1 year! Heres what they look like:
The whole package. It is from F&N.
The contents (from left to right) : 2 Stickers, A face towel, 2 Strawberry Milk, A T shirt and 2 movie tickets!
2 Cathay movie tickets - Valid for a year, free choice of movies. How nice!
On Sunday, my family and I went to some clan chinese new year celebration thing. We came like 1 hour late! People there already finish eating. LOL, so embarrasing. We got 5 lucky draw tickets as there are 5 of us. So its lucky draw time! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Yes! All 5 tickets won the lucky draw. So damn lucky lor, we got some vouchers and won a 2nd price - a box of bird nest! Yummy! Later that evening, my dad striked 4D (not any big prize la, just a small one). I can safely conclude that this weekend is a very lucky weekend and a period of time not to be forgotten easily.
Pardon my language for this post, it does not sound as well phrased and funny compared to the previous few posts. It could be due to school related stress or something. Anyway, hope you enjoyed reading. Will be posting about Feb week 2 SOON!
Here's a picture taken a few weeks back, Loo Loo using marker to draw Yan Xun face while he was sleeping. Childish sia!
Till then, VROOOOOMMMM!
